What motivates me and what makes me break

So, I've been eating clean. I did the Whole30 program. There's still so much to learn about how to fuel myself.

Here's what I discovered that was awesome:

• Once my body "detoxed" I felt amazing! Sure I was cranky for a few days, but overall, I felt great. 
• My cardio improved tremendously
• I felt stronger
• I found amazing new recipes that were fun to make and eat!
• I started being the "healthy" freak. 
• I lost 5-6 pounds
• It's easy to order the good stuff on menus now. It's possible!
• I'm not a big fan of red meat. I can handle ground beef, but steak cooked like a steak....not my cup of tea.
• I don't like leftover chicken. I only enjoy it right off the grill. Or with sauce.

Here's what I discovered that wasn't so awesome:

• I was HUNGRY! Jeez!
• The first 2 weeks, I didn't have much energy. The third week, perfect. The 4th week, back to struggling with energy.
• I was a lot more moody than I anticipated (poor Clark!)
• I didn't miss bread or pasta. I missed sugar!! I still crave sugar, desserts, brownies....cookies....ugh! I gotta stop this....

I think the biggest struggle is figuring out the right combination of carbs, fats, and protein. I added in a lot more good fats like avocados, coconut milk, coconut and olive oils. I couldn't quite figure out the carbs part of the diet though. I ate as many veggies as I could with a little fruit. However, I still couldn't consume enough carbs to give me energy. I'm really tempted to eat the way my nutritionist prescribed. But that also has a lot of processed foods in it, which I'm now discovering my body doesn't like! I've had crazy diarrhea this past week as I've introduced things back into my diet. Not a fan of that! I'm not sure if it's dairy or grains that are causing the diarrhea. 

Going forward:

I have my crossfit competition in 4 weeks from today. Here are some goals to keep me focused and motived:

• Lose another 5 pounds of fat and replace that with muscle. It may not happen by my comp on March 9, but I need to focus. 
• Get butterfly pull-ups
• Each week, I'm going add in one component to my nutrition. Dairy this week, grains next week, etc.

At the beginning of this Nutrition Challenge, we did a WOD, then we retested that same WOD today. I was really hoping to do better, but in fact I did worse. I got really sick in the middle of the WOD and ended up in the bathroom for 7 min of the 20 min WOD. Clark picked me up and I started bawling! We had a good talk on the drive home about what motivates me and what makes me break. It's interesting to think about. Here's what I've come up with so far.

What motivates me:

• I feel very confident and motivated with movements that I'm good at and comfortable with.
• If there's another girl about my level and we are head to head, that keeps me going.
• I like lifting weights.
• Positive comments from the coaches.

What breaks me:

• I get scared with intense cardio workouts. With my asthma, it freaks me out.
• When the coaches are in my face trying to motivate me, but aren't pleasant about it.
• When I know I'm doing bad, I get less and less motivated and its harder and harder to keep pushing
• When I get sick (Mr Pukey or the other end)

With this new knowledge, I think I will have a better understanding of what breaks me and what makes me move. This is going to help tremendously with how I approach my competition and even general workouts.